Here I go with the metaphors again. First let’s visualize the common snow globe.
It can vary in size. It can vary in shape. The contents, usually is some kind of meaningful scene which varies from owner to owner. But the swirling action of the “floaty stuff” is pretty much common to all of them.
So, of what is my snow globe made? My base on which the globe sits is the security I feel here at Peaceful Pines. The globe that encapsulates me is however far I choose to venture out at any give moment. For the scene inside the globe one could imagine a small figurine (that would be me) standing in a open area at the top of a hill surrounded by pine trees. For those of you who we have had the good fortune to have visit us here, may recognize the scene minus the house, shed and other out buildings. The floaty swirly stuff in this scenario would be my emotions.
How does a snow globe work? Something has to move the snow globe enough to make the floaty swirly stuff move around. It really doesn’t take much.
My snow globe has been getting “moved” at unpredictable times. After Joyce passed it seemed like the darn thing was being jostled every day. And the trigger could be anything. Perhaps it would just be the time of the day, the setting of the sun, the wildlife in the yard, or the discovery of an engagement ring in a collection of jewelry that could upset the calm of the globe.
My floaty swirly stuff includes longing, reflection, joy, calm, wonder, gratitude, awe, sadness, and relief. What is not included is regret or anger. There is no regret because I know that we did all that we could for Joyce during her struggle. There is no anger because I know that because we live we also die. When and how that happens is unfortunate to say the least, but it is inevitable. And as things played out there was nothing we did wrong and did not pursue. And more importantly, Joyce finished her life on her terms.
Oh, Heck, there I went and jostled my snow globe again.
For those who check back every now and again, I appreciate it very much. If you want to, you can choose to follow this blog. There is a button at the top right hand side that gives a follow option. In the past I tried to make regular updates for those who wanted to stay abreast of Joyce’s condition. At the moment I am not sure how often posts will occur. I will wait patiently for something to inspire me and that may take a while.
